They shoot my porno tomorrow. In some hotel room in Fontana. Two men, one woman. They didn’t tell me it was a hotel. I wrote it for a boardroom. I wrote it for our boardroom, in our office; after all we have the keys.
It’s corporate themed. A boss fucks his secretary and forces his married underling to participate. Light D/s stuff. They pitched it to me and I had an angle. Do it as a sexual harassment seminar. If we had the money, the whole video would be a parody of a corporate training video. Sarah has walked in on supervisor Frank bending Cathy over the copy machine. What action should she take? Jim, an outside vendor, has ejaculated in Wanda the shipping clerk, despite being asked to leave his fluids on her face, neck and chest. What might Wanda be feeling right now? Choose all that apply.
Instead it takes place after the mandatory video viewing. The boss essentially rapes his employees during the video comprehension Q & A. He eggs them on to increasingly vile sex acts in corporate doublespeak. “Think outside the box” practically wrote itself. The one requirement was that I add a scene where the secretary eats a doughnut off the boss’s dick. I signed off on your snack requisition forms, Jessica. You’re a hungry little piggie aren’t you.
It was a metaphor for the way corporatism rapes you. The way working life rapes you. It was about the torture of language and ideas in capitalist America. Words mean their opposite. They tell you something is to protect you when it’s meant to fuck you. Make sure you can’t sue them if you get raped.
It would have been the most profound porn of all time. People would have fast forwarded through the sex to hear my brilliant words. Realized they were living shells of lives. Risen up. Overthrown their oppressors. Ushered in a new age of brotherhood. Not now though. You take it out of the boardroom and you lose the message.
I was supposed to be in it, too. As the underling. But they only take test results from two places and I don’t have my card yet. Too bad. The chick is a real piece of ass.
I bet they leave the doughnut in.
EDIT: The shoot has been postponed because a porn star got the HIV.