Archive | October, 2021

Dream Number 5

18 Oct

I had a dream that Isolde was pregnant. We were roommates. She was Mexican instead of Filipina. Some discussion that it might be mine. But she’d gone from not showing to a medium size bump instantly. She’d be about 4 or 5 months, we decided. So it was his. He was in the picture before me in this dream. She was wearing a midriff shirt. I could see the belly. Her being Mexican it might have had some downy hair. And she asked if I wanted to stay and take care of it. Continue reading

Reader Mailbag: You’re an Old Loser

12 Oct

Sure. But that’s not what I worry about. I felt like an old loser at 22. Of course I look back now, see a picture of myself– I look like a baby. I feel like an old loser now. When I look back at 65 I’ll laugh at how stupid I was. I know this. Knowing this does nothing. It doesn’t help at all. But then hearing it from you doesn’t hurt. It does nothing. I hope it helps you. But you’ll wake up tomorrow needing to leave mean comments. I’ll wake up feeling like an old loser. It’s just genetic. Continue reading

Dasha’s Movie

9 Oct

I’m in the lobby of the doctor’s office waiting for my cancer results. My FWB Isolde who looks like a 15 year old Filipina prostitute is going to the West Coast premier of Dasha’s movie. At the Los Feliz 3 with one of the other dudes she’s fucking. I forget if it’s the one I’m trying to not be threatened by. But it has to be. I took her to the Marine Mammal Care Center. They rehabilitate sick pinnipeds. We saw a female elephant seal. She’s hot– Isolde, not the seal– and she smells good, and when I look at her I can sense myself start to catch feelings. I let it pass. Continue reading