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Author’s Note

10 Sep

Typing on my flattened out keyboard. Broke the struts punching it. Or the strut, singular. The one that was left. I did this because Microsoft Word was “justifying” margins on the last line of a piece in my putative next book. Broke the other strut from some formatting fuckup in my last book. You start with Createspace’s Microsoft Word 5.5 by 8.5 template. Cut/ paste from your web site. Whatever bits of Createspace’s aesthetic vision you disagree with, edit once. Define your font and layout as a style. Everything you paste should be in that style. Easy. Continue reading

Stay Anon, Stay Safe

9 Jul
annie anonymity

Annie, the Anemone of Online Anonymity

Here’s an “Editor’s Note:” I got doxed. I’m making some archives private. Don’t know how long.

Am I selling out? Is my new shit going to be a hostage video?

We’ll see.

I’d wanted to back off my shtick. Start with a new name. Publish a few things I’m proud of. Focus on the book. Not like this, but still– maybe it will be good for me.

Some posts are in books. Others gone for now. Might not give out the password. Making shit scarce and using that scarcity for rainy day money has an appeal, suddenly. Continue reading

Protected: Don’t Work

17 Jun

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Protected: Why Don’t You Quit Your Job, She Says

19 Mar

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Finally, Some Good News (Part 2)

2 Oct

finances

Previously

He was reviewing his finances. He’d worked two years. Now he had six months of money.

If I get fired tomorrow and couldn’t collect unemployment. Six months of the lifestyle to which I’m accustomed. About half to rent. Car payment. 30% of it’s interest even though the loan is 6% interest. The car was 16 grand but I’ll end up paying 29 grand if I stay on schedule. How financing works.

What do I have, he thought. The car. Some guitars. What else. My bike got stolen by the citizen offspring of undocumented whatever you call them now. Rent sixteen grand a year, shit not bolted down always stolen instantly. Like a doughnut on the beach snatched by seagulls. A laptop. An Xbox One with a used copy of The Witcher 3, which replaced a wife or girlfriend. 20 grand cash. 8 grand in credit card debt that had been charged off by the bank for two years now. That he’d been paying down 1% and 1% and 1% to keep Bank of America– actually Banc of America, their credit card division, from suing him. Garnishing wages. After paying 8 grand I owe $13,000 on a $16,000 car. If I pay a grand a month I’m out in about a year. Then hack away at the charge card. Call your creditor, Suze Orman told him. Ask to negotiate up to 50% off by offering one lump sum. They said fuck off. Continue reading

Protected: One Simple Trick to Self Publish a Bestseller

7 Jul

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Destroy the Earth

6 Jul

 

greenspan

Photo credit: the reptilians

My new collection The Pussy is out. Buy The Pussy, get The Pussy, tell your mom about The Pussy, etc.

If my sister reads this she’ll try to get you fired, she says. Even with the fake name. She gets vengeful about this sort of thing.

Well what can you do. What I said is true. So I said it. Maybe someone will get me fired. Maybe I should have started anonymous. Not shown anyone my shit. Not put up Youtube videos of my face for radio and voice for silent film. But: some people find me to fire me. Some people find me to fuck me. I want to get fucked more than I don’t want to get fired. Continue reading