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Belinda

6 Jul

Are you surprised I’m here, said Belinda. Mexican girls don’t date white boys. Au contraire, he said, I’ve had every one in town but you. Not the real ones, she said. I bet their parents spoke English.

She’d fucked her tattoo artist for three years. He was 44, married, someone snitched to the wife who then called Belinda’s mother. I want you to know your daughter’s a whore, she said. I’m going to tell your whole family. I’m going to go around your neighborhood, tell everybody. She did.

The tattoo artist came in her every time. She thought she couldn’t get pregnant. He said he’d meet her when she got the abortion. He posted on Instagram from a bar instead. He had eight other women he was sleeping with. The wife still doesn’t know.

When she finished the story he went to move her hair to kiss her. And she said: not on the first date.

Ain’t Never Gonna Ever Love Again

13 May

She’ll never talk to me again. She drank too much. She broke my shit. She fucked the bartender from Ostrich Farm her second night staying with me. She made men pay for everything– rent food plane fare. I would have had to pay for her ticket to come visit me again. She needed it to feel pretty. But she was perfect. Continue reading

Vacation Diary: The Vortex

28 Mar

sedona 1

Can’t look at my Sedona pics without that bad acid feeling. Haunted house feeling. People are right. There’s energy there. It’s evil. There was a massacre, something. I hiked to one of the attractions, a giant sinkhole. Hundred ton rocks had plummeted into the bowels of the Earth. I felt like an antenna picking up a TV station broadcast by Pennywise. Feel it again now talking about it. Last night before I slept. I carried it with me.
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Protected: Diary: Date Night Just Got Tastier

17 Mar

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Protected: Another Date

12 Mar

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Protected: Weekend Journal: Your Pussy Your Problem

11 Dec

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I Can See Myself with Her but She Has Herpes

30 Oct

I can see myself with her but she has herpes, I tell my therapist. She waited to tell me but I knew. The signs were there. She’s over 28 and lived in New York. That alone enough. But also she knows musicians. It’s funny, he says. Most of my clients are men. But the ones with herpes are all women.

He’s gay so he doesn’t know. Listen: all women only fuck the same five guys. If you have full bore raw sex with a herpes woman for a year, you have a four per cent chance of getting it. For a man to get herpes he’s fucking 500 women a year. Guys like that don’t go to therapy.