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This Is Why I Don’t Have a Girlfriend

4 Mar

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Don’t read this. Continue reading

Interview with the Pussy Vampire

24 May

cruise oprah

Here’s an interview I did with Chip Smith from Nine Banded Books. This will also be on Autistic Mercury. Possibly in print somewhere.

I wrote this before Roosh converted to Christianity and banned all mention of sex from his forum.

Like everything recently, it exists to plug my new book: Continue reading

Cuckolded by a Savage Armenian

10 Mar
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image: Wizards of the Coast

I have a new post at Autistic Mercury reviewing the “Cat Person” short story collection.

Also: Continue reading

Roots

3 Feb

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I’m posting old unpublished material to draw page views for my new novel Finally, Some Good News.

My mom got into genealogy. So did your mom. Older women love genealogy the way actresses love astrology. Whereas men know your great grandmother took a hot load from the blacksmith. Blacksmithed.com. Continue reading

Reader Mailbag: How Do I Get People to Read My Writing

12 Jan

streisand awards

David writes:

…how do you get people to come to your website when they don’t even know your name?

Continue reading

Reader Mailbag: What Do You Think about Donald Trump

13 Dec

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I’m posting old unpublished material to draw page views for my new book Finally, Some Good News.

This was written when Stan Lee was still alive, whenever he got accused of beating off on his maid’s face.
Continue reading

Fuck Cunt Pussy

3 Dec

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My new book is out. Need to write a blog post but I blew my kundalini beating off to teen underwear ads. Plus life is pretty good. I could get fired and still have money. Today I went to Target. Bought a welcome mat with a cheerful bird on it. Brushed steel trash can. Nickelplated curtain rods. My new home shaping up. Soon I can play Red Dead Redemption 2 without sun glare making the screen inscrutable. I found a fast horse. She had kicked an NPC to death as he tried to shoe her in a field. Killed the legendary white buffalo and had its skin turned into an outfit I find pleasing. Continue reading