I woke up at 2:22AM. She hadn’t come home. And I thought about her getting arrested. Or killed by a drunk driver. Hacked up and murdered. Gang raped.
Murdered by cholo gangsters. Murdered and carjacked. And I thought about how I’d get revenge. A drone with a bomb hovering over the cholo family barbecue. Shrapnel bomb shredding the gangbangers and their abuelas.
Meeting the perpetrator in jail for one of those spiritual forgiveness meetings. But then sliding his child’s finger across the table.
The blowgun. Her killer has been identified. Captured. He’ll stand trial. But the justice system is a farce. So I’ve spent the agonizing months awaiting the court date crafting and mastering a blowgun. It’s made from an ordinary Bic pen. It has a poison dart. I’ve spent 8 hours per day, every day, practicing on a man size target. Exact distance the defendant will be from me in the courtroom. It’s discouraging at first. I can’t hit a barn door with the blowgun. Can’t generate adequate force to penetrate ballistic gel and envenomate him. But like a montage in a kung fu movie I practice and practice. 18 months.
I arrive to the courthouse. Place my Bic pen in the bowl with my keys as I pass through the metal detector. Take my seat. Friends and family console me. The miscreant unshackled and seated. Clerks and lawyers recite their boilerplate. And I withdraw my pen. Bring it to my mouth. As if absently chewing the end. Fire a superhuman blast of air from my diaphragm trained stacking sandbags on my guts. The defendant swats his neck as if bit by a mosquito. And I stalk from the courtroom. As he begins convulsing from the strychnine. On my way to my burner car and my burner plane ticket to Taipei with my Canadian passport. From there to the docks, $200 cash to a fisherman who takes me to the northern tip of the Philippines. You can see it from Taiwan. And I vanish.
Each morning in the jungle mist I contemplate a portrait of Susannah. Hacked to death by Mexicans. I dedicate my new life to her. I travel Asia as a blowgun master helping families in need.
I call her. She went home cuz she wanted to sleep in her own bed.
Still.
delicioustacos 
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amazing…he’s done it again….except…they prob won’t let you bring a sketchy-looking BIC pen into the courtroom. depends on who is at the gate. maybe the guard tests the pen out and sees it is changed to spit out a dart. oh and you wouldn’t get to decide where you sit, another variable. no clear shot of the perp’s neck. but of course this is just fiction so whatever. i get the point. this is what happens when you love someone. you care about them too much and they either leave, get ill, or do something stupid that gets themselves into trouble. this is why i only care about myself.
truth is, we’re here to get loosh farmed from us. earth is a massive loosh farm. doesn’t matter what the shape is, globe or flat. doesn’t matter if it’s physical-material or a digital simulation. demons are real. maybe god is real too but he’s abandoned us. or maybe god is backing those who are good and worthy to survive, and allows demons to torment those who are bad. truth is nothing is perfect. you might get a loving gf who then dies or loses feelings for you. you might get a loving gf who stays with you for the rest of your life, your loving companion, and nothing bad happens to you or her. who knows. everything involves risk. but the loosh, it’s a really compelling theory that explains why everything is the way it is. it also explains why it’s so hard to maintain a totally neutral mood. you’re either happy or sad, mad or glad, etc. all these emotions. why? because we’re human? i don’t know. maybe that’s why Ai is being touted as the next new great tech. and of course the most hardcore Ai ppl will say it is better than humans, will replace us. ultimately what will make us different from Ai are these range of emotions.
Manosphere Grifters, racists, misogynists, deluded Boomers, Incels/MGTOWers, Alt-righters, AntiVaxxers, Craptobros, Memestonkers, Finfluencers, Muskrats, Qnutz, Xian fundies, MMA/WWF seat sniffers, Maggat cultists, paid Putin shills, Ammosexuals, Libertarians, SovCits and selfhating GOP gays make the weirdest Venn Diagram.
i have AIDs…
You forgot anti-semites, dumbass. Also, BTC went above $100K and I’m basically richer than you. Fuckin retard.
hi. name’s anon. i’m addicted to sex. today i stroked my dick with a bagel to celebrate yom kippur. i then gave the bagel to my rabbi, who is female. she said it didn’t smell good and threw it in the trash. made me sad.
Thanks to your blog, I quit drinking. With the sobriety and mental clarity, I started a company that helps women recycle their dildos into a renewable, eco-friendly building material. Basically I hired a female assistant to call up her fellow women and ask them to donate their used, unwanted dildos. Then we sort ’em, shred ’em and turn them into pellets. The pellets are compressed into bricks that are then used to make affordable housing in under-developed countries. I now have 2 employees and have enough data to start pitching to VCs for expansion. WAGMI.
delicioustacos, you wouldn’t do shit, you weak faggot liberal cuck.