Reader Mailbag: BF Out of My League

15 Mar

(REDACTED) asks:

I guess I want to know why an incredible good looking man would date an average looking woman…I met a hot as hell man who should be dating a supermodel and for some reason he has an interest in me, he’s not pushing sex at all, so I dont think its him thinking I’m desperate and he could easily get into my pants…he just wants to hang out and gives me amazing kisses. I dont get it. I’m an hour away, I dont drive, I dont have a job and I’m very average looking and a little chubby. I’m just not sure how to proceed with him.

Uh, who cares?  Pussy is pussy.  Or in your case, dick is dick.  Or, non-dick is non-dick, since you say he isn’t using you for sex.

Wait, why is that a good thing, that he isn’t fucking you.  That he isn’t “pushing” to fuck you.  Fucking is good.

I mean, I don’t know why he wants to date you.  But who cares.  I used to think that all the time—why on earth would this girl want to be with me, etc.  Every time.  Every time they would stop dating me. No good can ever come of thinking this.

I don’t drive—who cares.  Guys don’t care about this shit.  I mean, it’s a logistical pain in the ass, but, it doesn’t diminish your actual worth, it just makes it more of a pain in the ass to see you.  It doesn’t diminish you in the same way it would if you were a guy, where if you didn’t drive it would be some big deal.  That sense of entitlement to have everything taken care of is the province of women.

I don’t have a job—again, who cares.  Guys do not give a shit if you have a job jerking off prize pigs for semen sales or if you’re the president.  We don’t care.  Your accomplishments mean absolutely nothing.  Some reactionary antifeminists will actually say that it works against you to have a good career, but if that’s actually the case I think it’s more that people who have good careers can’t shut the fuck up about their careers and it makes them a pain in the ass to be around.  It makes you feel shitty about your own career and the whole thing just becomes a nightmare.  But if there were a hot president, and she could come home at night and shut the fuck up about being the president, my 40 thousand dollar a year earning ass would gladly bone, and date, that president.  And I would just as gladly date someone with no job.  It just—it just doesn’t enter into the equation, a woman’s job.  I mean, it’s cool if you have a job that gives you good stories, or if you work at an awesome restaurant and bring home free food all the time. But—don’t think of it like—

Here is the problem. You are thinking of it as though what he wants must be what you would want.  Because maybe you would think “he has no job, he has no car: what a loser,” or “what would my friends think. “  Men and women are not the same. Who knows what he wants.  Maybe you are easy to be around.  Maybe—and see, here’s another thing, I mean, obviously you have very low self esteem if you’re even asking the question “why is this hot guy interested in dating me.” If you were a guy, your cringing self-loathing insecurity would completely work against you, more than any lack of job, lack of car—if you were a guy, even having to ask the question “why would this person be interested in dating me” is instant death to all pussy, now and forever.

But you’re not a guy.  You’re a woman.  You can get away with that shit.  So why does he want to date you?  I don’t know—maybe the self-awareness you show in your email manifests itself in person as an interesting, no-bullshit human being who is willing to examine real topics honestly and have real conversations, etc. Maybe it makes you have an extraordinary sense of humor.  Maybe you have big tits. Who knows.

But the point is: who cares.  If a hot person is into you: just get that pussy.  Don’t ruminate on it, don’t examine it, don’t take it apart.  Just get that pussy, and enjoy it while you have it.  Let’s not mourn the bridegroom while he’s with us.

2 Responses to “Reader Mailbag: BF Out of My League”

  1. cn July 7, 2012 at 8:11 pm #

    i love this post. ur so right about the driving/job thing. a girl can totally get away with that sh!t. i loved this post!

  2. J Boners September 5, 2014 at 10:53 pm #

    I’m interested in that job pumping off pigs for semen collection? And also the big tits. How do we arrange that?

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