The Crustaceans

15 Jun

When I was a kid, I used to always have this vision, this sensation, that there were these slimy black crustaceans, kind of like a crayfish, visible only to me. They lived underneath everything. And whenever I would touch a wall or a chair or something they would latch on to my hands and fingers with their knobby little black pincers, first a few and then more and more until there were thousands of them swarming up my arms fast as fuck and eating me. They had prickly little pincer-legs, glossy black eyes on twitchy little stalks, rows of serrated little mouth-feelers rippling up to a weird spiny-armored alien mandible– and I would basically have to shake the shit out of my hands to get them off, so hard that my thumb would snap into my fingers and make a loud noise. That was the whole point: my mind wanted to make me do something loud so that other people would notice and I would be embarrassed. When I saw that other people could hear it and were looking the sensation would only get worse, more vivid. I could feel their sharp little serrated mouths chewing into my skin, and the urge to shake them off would just fucking amplify… and I would just be standing there like a dick, everybody looking at me, with my arms kind of hanging out by my sides like a crippled bird, shaking the shit out of my hands and snapping my fingers and thumbs together. This was from like 10 to 13.

8 Responses to “The Crustaceans”

  1. Anonymous June 15, 2012 at 4:00 pm #

    What made this go away? How did you realize that it was “my mind wanted to make me do something loud so that other people would notice and I would be embarrassed”?

  2. lenore June 15, 2012 at 7:53 pm #

    was wondering, what exactly is the criteria for a post to be labled “Winston Churchill’s Dick”?

    • lenore June 15, 2012 at 7:57 pm #

      *labeled ( probably shouldn’t comment under the influence…)

      • delicioustacos June 15, 2012 at 9:20 pm #

        It’s the “misc” category.

  3. Fakegirlfriend June 15, 2012 at 8:08 pm #

    It’s ok baby. They can’t hurt you now. I will keep you safe (and also–try avon’s ‘skin so soft’ –a remarkable repellant!)

    • lenore June 16, 2012 at 9:06 am #

      ‘skin so soft’… lol. good one!

Trackbacks/Pingbacks

  1. STD Diary 2006: Tales from Non-Gonoccocal Urethrographic Oceans « delicioustacos - June 20, 2012

    […] not a cool off-beat obsessive-compulsive like me with colorful, interesting fears and rituals. Rather a fucking lame hand-washing one- how fucking generic can you be? But I’m standing there […]

  2. Old Dads’ Shriveled Five-headed Sperm Makes Their Kids Autistic and Crazy « delicioustacos - August 22, 2012

    […] away.  The flu just goes away.  Human papillomavirus just goes away.  I had severe crippling OCD when I was a kid that would require me to recite long litanies of crazy nonsense 10 times perfectly […]

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: