I used to drink every day by myself. I’ve been sober ten years. I did it by going to Alcoholics Anonymous meetings. Helping others stay sober. Working the 12 steps with my sponsor. It’s the best thing I ever did. You should do it too. God is real.
What else. I don’t think about sobriety anymore. It’s not a struggle. I like being sober.
But I gotta write something for it. Like I had to put on the same gay outfit as my brothers and pose for my stepmom’s Christmas card. A special occasion. Gotta go take cakes at meetings per my sponsor’s direction. Tell other alcoholics how I did it.
I did it the same as everyone. AA meetings. Talk to alcoholics. Work the steps. This always works. No one who does this has not stayed sober. Almost everyone who does not do this does not stay sober.
They don’t want to. I don’t blame them. It’s amazing to drink. You can talk to women. I was at a reading. My reading, my name was on the flyer in big font. I looked good, I had a quality haircut, I wore a cool leather jacket someone with taste helped me pick. I can’t have sex. I don’t want to have sex outside a relationship. No stakes to my conversations with women. But I was nervous talking to women. I need to impress them. Afraid they’ll reject me from pussy I don’t want. Or if they respect me they’ll stop. I could solve this easily. With one drink of alcohol. Steroids for liking people. Feeling like people like you.
What you learn in sobriety is to eat that bad feeling and get through it. Just let it pass by.
Keep doing this. One day you can just handle it.
I went to Echo Park to take a cake. At the start of an AA meeting, other alcoholics hold up a birthday cake with a candle you blow out. You talk about how you stayed sober. For the newcomer. They hear how great you have it. I heard that shit as a newcomer. I thought everyone who took their cake were corny losers. Still, I went. I do what my sponsor tells me.
The meeting was closed. It rained on the Methodist church. The roof leaked. The building unusable. God made His views known. Outside a few guys clustered by the wheelchair ramp. Telling people they could meet on Zoom.
We had a meeting anyway. I spoke in the driveway. I said shit I should have said in this post. But I forget it now. Said it to newcomers from the halfway house instead of you. Something about how I live in a building where gas is piped in. I hit the thermostat and luxurious heat comes out. I turn a knob and hot water a Roman emperor would envy comes out of the shower. Because I haven’t crashed my car into a child. Didn’t text my boss a death threat. I put on clothes and I perform simple tasks and money is put in my account that makes lights come on and steaks be in the fridge and it’s a good way to live. I’m grateful for it. No one I care about hates me. I don’t hate myself.
Alcoholics Anonymous is good, and it works. It worked for me. I’ve seen it work thousands of times. I don’t know anything else that worked for anyone. Drunks ask me what if I tried XYZ instead. Some cope alternative. I don’t blame them. It sucks not to drink. Until one day it’s great.
There’s a long time listening to corny dorks blather on. It sucks balls but if you’re an alcoholic I’m telling you. Life is brilliant and wonderful. Nervous at the party feeling like an asshole. That never goes away. But knowing God is real. Knowing it will pass.
delicioustacos 
Even though a clean life of sobriety is good for the individual. Isn’t it interesting that most of the great work people do is when they are going through the worst times, are addicted to something, broke or gone through heartbreak. I think of all the bands that used to be good, that made their best music when they were personally at their worst. Now clean and sober they suck and couldn’t write a good song for the life of them.
Your work as well. Tomorrow is Another Day is my absolute favorite post by you. Just brilliant, and the end is perfect hilarity. It’s all just a part of life, there is good and bad but the really good work is always done when it’s bad. More of the Yin and the Yang I guess. Strange world we live in.
Delicious Tacos great achievement brother. I’m coming on 10 years with no booze. It sucks at first, damn near all your habits have to change to live life without it so there is that. Eventually, you get used to it and one day being sober is great. Booze holds you back and life without it is just easier.
Alcoholism is the price society pays for liquor being freely available in the stores; the same way that Christmas depression among the minority is the price of gifts under the tree for the many.
Come visit my website; click on the name and leave some comments, if you like
OKAY you can’t click on my name
my site is:
http://www.dark.sport.blog
that background is offputting and makes it hard to read when the white text happens to overlap with the bright part of the graphic. then you’ve got the fuckin gif on the side which is distracting. what’s going on big guy, how can you make such blunders.
I wanted to say something important.
Delicious Tacos, I have been watching you from afar for a very long time. In another city I lived in, I read all your earlier works over a span of many hours, enjoying myself thoroughly. I’ve been busy establishing my business since then and haven’t been able to invest as much time in dt.com as I would have liked, but I always kept you in my heart. There will come a time when I’ll invite you to move up North and join me in British Columbia, Canada, for a paid job that offers more than you’ve ever had in L.A. I hope you’ll accept. For instance, I plan on making movies. You might make a good studio head, with benefits and salary commensurate to the position. I am not shitting you. I am being completely serious. You can start making this dream come true by commenting regularly on my site. I fixed the name-link problem; you can now go directly to my virtual home away from home by clicking MR. DARK. Hope to see you there, my friend
— Greg N.
jeebus h xrist this poast made me wanna chug a fuckin craft beer “with shockingly high alc content”. for some reason your writing is so depressing (to me). wish i could quit this f*ggot blog once and for all. was vibing just a minute ago. fuck sobriety! and fuck reading!!
update: i’m on my 2nd tall can o’ Coors. congrats on your sobriety, bitch. MORE ALCOHOL FOR ME!!!
God is real.
She wants us to be happy.
But I’m only happy when I’m drunk.
Bottom’s up.
you’re a poet, Hairy!!!
fuckin privileged whiteboi. you will never know what it’s like to be a sub-6ft brownoid without blue eyes. yea yea congrats on quitting alcohol. that’s low-hanging fruit. the final boss is quitting porn and sluts. you absolute mong. get a fookin pinay wife already. if you don’t own a CyberTruck™ by now you have failed as a man. go watch Nick’s scuffed realtor. go buy a vintage art deco engagement ring. have it ready for when you meet an age appropriate pinay. you moron. you have no idea how good your life is compared to mine. fuck off with your holier-than-thou morality. you would be NUFFIN without me. you gaijin dilettante. your writing was 6million times better when you were drinking, smoking and doing blacktar under the 405 fwy. fookin f*g. i could end you with one roundhouse kick.
8 years March 6, 2024. I lived the dream 2006-2015ish working remote bullshit jobs and fucking every woman I saw online. I like to think I’m better now.
That’s a good thing. I do miss the posts about almost banging black lesbians who end up chasing you down the street, though. It’s either that, or sobriety and a nice life dying alone and then your most recent cat eats 1/8 of your body until the neighbors notice a weird smell and the fact the electricity was cut off weeks ago. Tough choice, brother.
First time checking your blog in a few months, thanks for this!
This is only the second post of yours I’ve read, the first being about the worker getting raped by the LA Times owner in Siberia. I have been attending Codependent’s Anonymous meetings for six months, and just last weekend went to two scathing, painful, horrendous, wonderful Adult Children of Alcoholics meetings, both programs I can safely say have changed my life and the way I feel more than the porn, video games, stress-eating, self-harm, workaholism, and other various escapes ever changed the way I felt.
So I read this post with some trepidation, that it was going to be a scathing and sarcastic judgement of the program – a fiction – as the only people who I ever seem to come across online speak about the 12 steps in as negative terms as they do about child abuse in the Catholic church, posturing themselves as a judge over the “desperate cultists” that find meaning there, and it’s always painful for me to be a disappointment to others.
I was relieved to see, and pleased for you, that it was not a story about someone other than yourself. I haven’t struggled with alcohol much in my past – my abuse has taken other forms – but AA gave me more of a father than I otherwise would have, and I am the type to try and always give credit where it is due.
You may be interested in an AA share that really changed my life, and I’ve gotten so much out of listening to it over the years. I found a CD of it that my dad bought at a convention, listened to it on a whim, and was left speechless. Here’s a download link for it from my MEGA account.
https://mega.nz/file/j8Y2FIZC#tIOzPL4SvfAlhHLNmVZnxA4-Riy2eQVLDiSTyHkILGw
And this is a share from Arbutus O’Neal – one of the very very early members of what became the Al-Anon Family Groups. This is a great podcast, too.
https://therecoveryshow.com/2013/03/arbutus-on-speaker-talk/
Thank you, and God bless you.
Testing – I’d tried to leave a comment, but hit “post” the page refreshed, and now it’s gone…well, anyway, I was happy to see that the post wasn’t a sarcastic or fictional short story. This is an AA share that changed my life, from an old Vietnam war veteran. It’s an mp3 file inside this zip folder from my MEGA account.
https://mega.nz/file/j8Y2FIZC#tIOzPL4SvfAlhHLNmVZnxA4-Riy2eQVLDiSTyHkILGw