Diary: Kate Flakes

9 Jul

Fucking Kate.  That is a permaflake.  “Sorry, I’m gonna have to be lame and take a raincheck! (frowny face).”  Permaflake!  Except- she included a frowny face…. I keep looking at it.  That frowny face means she is frowning to not be able to hang out with me, right?  Despite not having a counterproposal of any kind and not saying anything in the intervening day and waiting until prompted by my text to say something—maybe she still likes me, right?  Maybe maybe maybe.

How come whenever it’s one of these “maybe” things, a “maybe” is always a no.  Why can’t  a maybe just be a goddamn motherfucking yes for once.  Have this chick text me and say “Gotta take a raincheck (frowny face), but hey– how about fuckin Tuesday.”  How about Tuesday, I’ll take you out for a taco and then we can have hot unprotected sex and I’ll let you jizz in me.  How come it can never be that.  “Maybe” is always “I liked you OK when I was a little drunk but now I’m completely uninterested and you wasted a bunch of fucking time and money and you could have been playing Xbox.”  God.

6 Responses to “Diary: Kate Flakes”

  1. LE July 9, 2012 at 10:28 am #

    Thanks for ruining my morning by making me feel guilty for sending four of these messages in the last few hours. If it makes you feel any better, she’s probably just shopping for overpriced jeans online, listening to mopey Fiona Apple/Cat Power/Imogen Heap songs, and mourning for her college boyfriend who moved to Germany during that time you might be having hot sex.

  2. Anonymous July 9, 2012 at 11:05 am #

    Uh yeah, obviously.

  3. Anonymous July 9, 2012 at 1:45 pm #

    Getting a flake text is better than getting a text saying, “I changed my mind about you.” Flake texts are just multi-word euphemisms that save the ego of both parties involved.

  4. Anonymous July 9, 2012 at 6:52 pm #

    She’s probs not worth it if you consider time spent with her ‘a waste of time and money that could have been spent playing xbox.’ Maybe for the best.

  5. Michelle Morgan July 10, 2012 at 3:58 pm #

    Another reason why you should date an old.

  6. Anonymous July 13, 2012 at 5:38 pm #

    Hypocrisy abounds,dear sir. You have zero problem doing this to another yet when it happens to you, it’s all ‘why me?’ “i dont understand!” etc etc. Be a man, take the shit that you dole out on a regular basis.

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