Anyway, poly people. I agree with what they’re saying, when they explicitly outline the tenets of the poly lifestyle, or movement, or whateverthefuck it is on their profile. And they always do. There is always an apologia– I’m just doing what your husband is doing, but I’m doing it honestly. There is always a knee jerk paragraph pre-empting some boilerplate criticism with their boilerplate response. And that’s what sucks about poly people– their put-uponness. Their humorlessness. Same with the “S&M subculture” and all this other shit– I like fucking a bunch of girls; I like pulling their hair and maybe throwing a forearm into their neck once in a while, but I don’t like how much people who self-identify as liking these things talk like some tiny marginal religious group constantly bitching about how they just want to be left alone on their compound. Trust me, people do not give as much of a shit as you think and it would just– it would just make you easier to be around if you weren’t so god damn touchy. It’s like this with porn stars too. Every conversation with them, they’re so guarded, so conscious that they’re going to be held in contempt– they’re nerds, these porn stars. They’re nerds sitting in the AV club constantly bitching about the jocks, who are everyone who doesn’t take a load in the eye for a living.
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miserable man
“trust me, people do not give as much of a shit as you think”… soooo true.
fag
Agreed. It’s irritating as shit when people identify themselves with something that’s scandalous-in-their-own mind; they get this condescending “I’m into ‘different’ stuff” attitude and think that because they’re obsessed with it, YOU’RE obsessed with it.
I find that people who are into weird shit who TALK about that weird shit are sad little husks who can’t interest anyone with who they ARE (even themselves) so they have to constantly remind themselves about what they DO. And the ones who are hyper-sensitive to judgment can piss off; they only feel special because we live in a country that’s sexually repressed. Deviant fish in a puritanical pond, really.
Previously I’ve met people thrugoh friends, usually at house parties. After spending 3yrs in Sydney and not really having any luck with meeting anybody I started to wonder if something was broken about me. I got a job offer in Brisbane so within the space of 4wks I’d packed and moved my life back to where I went to uni and worked for a year after.A friend asked me along to the weekly coffee meet-up that some Brisbane Twitter people go to. Not one to say no to a coffee I went one week. I met this guy there, thought he was nice and wrote him off as all nice guys I meet tend to be unavailable. I feeling very homesick for Sydney and found myself talking more to him; he organised weekend stuff to get out of the house and out with people. A month passes, my housemate has got sick of me talking about how I’m into this guy but too afraid to tell him. She met him herself and was convinced he feels the same. I invited him to dinner with some people and somebody asked us how long we’ve been together (not knowing we weren’t). After dinner he went out of his way to walk me to the ferry stop and while waiting we wind up admitting we’re mutually interested in each other. A few days later at my housewarming I asked him to be my boyfriend. Totally didn’t expect to meet the man I’ve spent the last 15months with less than 2 months after moving interstate but it happens like that sometimes. Since being together we’ve found a few coincidences and I’m not sure how we didn’t meet before now but really I’m glad I had some years by myself to get my crap together and work out what I want from a partner. We’ve spent the last 3wks away together and it’s been wonderful but it will be nice to be home
Don’t give up, I realise how smug it might sound but it will happen and there are plenty of ways to meet people. Not finding who you’re after sucks, I’ve been there! Hang with friends, be selfish and enjoy some me time as it won’t last forever.