Ain’t Never Gonna Ever Love Again

13 May

She’ll never talk to me again. She drank too much. She broke my shit. She fucked the bartender from Ostrich Farm her second night staying with me. She made men pay for everything– rent food plane fare. I would have had to pay for her ticket to come visit me again. She needed it to feel pretty. But she was perfect.

She was a coke fiend who took every cock on the continent. But she held me when my father died. Took care of Bud when I had to fly back. When he died too she made me talk about memories of him so I wouldn’t go crazy. What can you say; I wish I had more poetic shit to put here. But it was better to be with her looking at stupid bullshit on her phone than anything has been with anyone else.

What would have happened if I’d flown her out. If we’d gone to Catalina like I said. I didn’t follow through so she chased some other guy to fucking Denmark. She wouldn’t tell me anything about him. To torture me. Left him and went to France and fucked some guy her second minute there and she’s still with him now. Eight foot Algerian coke dealer. Good luck Muhammed. She’ll marry him and he’ll beat her like she wanted. She’ll probably cum while being stoned to death. You have to leave him. Come back. I made one mistake. I’d be with you now instead of alone, swimming in this fucking garbage patch.

You’re a cunt but when I die I want to be back waking up next to you in Texas. The cicadas going. Looking at you perfect while you slept.

Not believing how good the world was.

28 Responses to “Ain’t Never Gonna Ever Love Again”

  1. Nikolai Vladivostok May 13, 2017 at 7:12 pm #

    Look on the bright side. One day she’ll be old and therefore invisible to men. This period will make up the greater part of her life. Have a good weekend.

  2. Small May 13, 2017 at 8:46 pm #

    I dunno, dude. I think she should stay with the coke dealer. Not many of us get to try their wings. Whole lifetimes being treated like an active or potential fuckvessel and not much else for most of us, and here’s a smart one out there having fun. At first I thought she was boring… but it’s actually the things *you* say about her that get boring. All you want to do is fuck her and *not* pay her.

  3. Anonymous May 13, 2017 at 10:36 pm #

    You ‘member in middle school, you had that one crush you knew was perfect for you. But, it never worked out or you just never got together. This is the same except you’re in your 40s and no one’s pulling wedgies on you anymore.
    Look, you’ll meet someone DT. Till then, fucking some random Tinder match every other night will just have to do.

    • Nikolai Vladivostok May 14, 2017 at 2:03 am #

      I agree. A man over 30 should pine for money, not love. So should a man under 30 but try telling them that.

  4. SG May 13, 2017 at 11:24 pm #

    Glad I’m mgtow. That sucks having woman rule your mind like that. I love reading these rants though, guess you feel “truely alive” with all the up’s and downs? Hehe. Something to blog about. Muslims and their 85 IQ’s are the future and she knows it. Little baby mudsharks on the way no doubt.

  5. Redphoenix May 13, 2017 at 11:51 pm #

    This speaks to me after a wife of 21 years cheated on me very badly.

  6. Atlanta Man May 14, 2017 at 7:13 am #

    Feel better man, I still love you and so does my girlfriend,asshole.

  7. Anonymous May 14, 2017 at 9:14 am #

    Her life is chaos and she’s not happy, nor will she be. If you two had the real thing she knows it. If not it’s not worth worrying about.

    • Aint nothin like the real thing May 14, 2017 at 2:49 pm #

      Imagine that a man had a soul, and that soul’s divine compliment — the real thing — was a globe straddling, drug and alcohol addicted whore. Now describe this man’s soul in the space below:

  8. Anonymous Kiwi May 14, 2017 at 9:50 pm #

    D-T, I really can’t work you out mate.

    You’re behaving like a total chump. Now I know, that you know, that you’re better than this. I really wouldn’t give a shit, but your writing – when you write well – is fucking excellent. I genuinely believe you’re one of this century’s bona fide important American male authors.

    And I also wouldn’t give a shit if you behaving like a cross between a hormonal 15 year old and menopausal 50 year old was resulting in great writing.

    But your writing is currently a wankstain and your relationship with women is the same.

    Get a grip.

  9. no mercy May 15, 2017 at 10:33 am #

    What’s her Instagram? I’m gonna holla and punish her pussy for DT.

    • no mercy May 15, 2017 at 10:35 am #

      I’ll fly her out too.

  10. Bonnes Tacos May 16, 2017 at 7:59 am #

    Freeze it, personalize it, polarize it. Then use it for a story.

  11. anonymous May 16, 2017 at 7:58 pm #

    hey dt, how long did it take you to learn how to write?

  12. Anonymous May 17, 2017 at 11:45 am #

    You big baby.

  13. Anonymous May 17, 2017 at 12:13 pm #


  14. The Empty Subject May 17, 2017 at 1:25 pm #

    I hope you feel better too. Also, maybe it’s time for a new topic.

  15. Sorcerygod May 18, 2017 at 11:37 am #

    The almost-painful-sincerity of Delish is just one of the things that make him worth reading.

    Delicious, I am hereby extending an invitation for you to comment at my website on a regular basis. You’ll like it. IT’S A WORLD-HEADSPINNING-CHANGER.

    Come and leave comments whenever you have a spare moment. That’s an order, soldier!

  16. whu May 19, 2017 at 1:50 pm #

    DT, you got a bomb-ass male secretary job even though in an earlier post you noted that the hiring manager always wants a chick.

    How’d you do it? Dropping industry anecdotes?

  17. J.A.F.O. May 27, 2017 at 12:21 am #

    Tacos, maybe you like her so much ’cause she’s still Toxic and part of you misses that lifestyle. But you learned that the Ride eventually ends. Fuck man, if the worst you did to yourself was end up with a double-butthole as opposed to, I dunno, say, back with your parents at 40, unable to work, on Medicaid, welfare, food stamps & enduring a slow waste-away death from chronic pancreatitis then you got off easy. Physically, that is.
    The psychological shit is the coal for your fucking oven, man. Most people can only roast marshmallows.

    Yeah. Anyway, time to do book #3. Oughta be a collection of your fiction stuff. Call it, “La Schmear.” Or do a fucking guitar EP or a goddamned spoken-word thing. If I had the bread, I’d sponsor you like that (what’s-his-fucking name, Robin?) Magnum PI dude’s boss who you never see in the show.

    Keep writing, you fuckin fuck. Your hurt helps.

    • Britney May 29, 2017 at 7:18 am #

      “Tacos, maybe you like her so much ’cause she’s still Toxic”

      Baby, can’t you see
      I’m calling
      A guy like you should wear a warning
      It’s dangerous
      I’m falling
      There’s no escape
      I can’t wait
      I need a hit
      Baby, give me it
      You’re dangerous
      I’m loving it
      Too high
      Can’t come down
      Losin’ my head
      Spinnin’ ’round and ’round
      Do you feel me now?
      The taste of your lips
      I’m on a ride
      You’re toxic I’m slippin’ under
      With a taste of a poison paradise
      I’m addicted to you
      Don’t you know that you’re toxic?
      And I love what you do
      Don’t you know that you’re toxic?
      It’s getting late
      To give you up
      I took a sip
      From my devil’s cup
      Slowly, it’s taking over me
      Too high
      Can’t come down
      It’s in the air and it’s all around
      Can you feel me now?
      Taste of your lips
      I’m on a ride
      You’re toxic I’m slippin’ under
      With the taste of a poison paradise

  18. Abracaxandra July 8, 2017 at 10:51 am #

    This breaks my heart.

  19. DJC November 20, 2019 at 10:44 am #

    This is SOOOO well written, it’s f’ing fantastic in my opinion. Sometimes, they just never leave you.

  20. Anonymous September 1, 2020 at 8:21 am #

    i think about this all the time


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