Oh God I Was a Fucking Fool to Let Her Go

29 Jun

sunset may june

She texted me back. Didn’t want to go to work this morning. Wanted to spend those hours telling her: come back. I’ll quit. We’ll travel the world with the money left after bespoke surgery to graft your golden asshole to my mouth. Cut off my nuts for your coin purse. My cock for your toe ring. Come back to me come back to me. The phone dings and I jump for it like pushing my baby out from in front of a bus and it’s someone else.

Stop not talking to me. I want to mail you the book. The girl looks like you. Because when it was gonna turn into a “real book–” when I wrote a plot instead of normal shit like this, I was scared. I said I might throw this away. You said it was good, keep going. Who else would do this. All women are garbage, except you.

Now I fucked up and prayed. God please remove my obsession. He answered. I feel nothing. No sadness but no hope either. Ready for work. Drive in and park and walk and stand in the elevator. Punch in on ADP and make my coffee and sit. Waiting a long time for nothing good to happen again.

12 Responses to “Oh God I Was a Fucking Fool to Let Her Go”

  1. Anonymous June 29, 2019 at 1:57 pm #

    She is never going to come back to you. Let her go. She is toxic, and the control she has over you is toxic. She knows it, and she lords over you with it. That is because she is a fucking bitchwhore and cunt.

    You are Codependent. You belong in CoDA, not just AA.

  2. Poptarts June 29, 2019 at 3:26 pm #

    You use ADP? We used to use but switched to Paychex. Way better, you can see all your benefits, 401k balance and make adjustments whenever you want. I really like it.

  3. Nikolai Vladivostok June 29, 2019 at 6:18 pm #

    As art this is fine, but surely you realize that letting a girl know you feel this way dries her up like talcum powder.
    To the girl preening as she reads this post: he’s talking about someone else. A much younger, hotter girl. Also she’s a virgin and does not know how to use a smartphone.

  4. Abracaxandra June 29, 2019 at 7:09 pm #

    Congruent vibe here
    This sliced through me

  5. Bitchwhore is my new doom metal band. We need a female bass player June 30, 2019 at 10:28 am #

    …someone who’ll dress up in Conan the Barbarian invasion stripes & throw her tampon at the crowd. And fingers like Geezer fucking Butler.
    1st project is a rock opera about our Delicious host here, who’ll get 20% of the t-shirt sales (don’t think we’re gonna forget you,dude. Yours is the sweetest plum).
    So let’s haul ass, ladies, trannys, whatever. That Mesa 400+ ain’t gonna play itself.

  6. bowler hat June 30, 2019 at 9:21 pm #

    for someone who was supposed to be a pillar of the manosphere, you sure are a fag

  7. shilling bootleg kamala harris fleshlights from my car trunk July 3, 2019 at 10:26 am #

    beta behaviour yields beta results. you go for these ferocious tiger-mom-but-rich-liberal type aZn grils then wonder why they don’t respect you. its because these types are the worst of cunts. you deserve better tacos! try hanging out in pasadena, at some boba shop near PCC, and find yourself a shy qt under age 20, not these careerist roasties who are happy to stay on the carousel. i have never tried to lead you astray with my comments, only the best advice flows from these finger tips. i axe for nuffin in return.

  8. Choad July 6, 2019 at 1:19 pm #

    I want to buy Hot Naked Tits, but i can’t find it on Amazon. Where do i find it, DT? Post a link.

    • Choad July 7, 2019 at 10:35 am #

      Nevermind, found it.

  9. Ivan The Terribly July 9, 2019 at 2:42 am #

    Take note kids, this is what happens to self proclaimed LA writers and pickup gurus after a few years. Whining and crying on shitty blogs and being somebody’s bitch secretary 9-5 slave manlet.

  10. Daniel July 21, 2019 at 9:50 am #

    Daniel did not create the above article. This is
    Defamation. You guys are breaking the law.

    Does Jordan know about your part Jeff?

    Look at #4 on NYTBSL.

    Bitch.

  11. Pj Carrington July 21, 2019 at 9:52 am #

    I once was poison ivy but now I’m your daisy. 2 months. Enjoy them guys.

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