That Thing with the One Chick’s Face

8 Aug

She is extremely hot. But when I am most assured of the fact that she’s attracted to me she starts to look like a goofy fat-faced fourteen year old boy, and when I think she’ s blowing me off, then I remember how preposterously hot she is. Everybody’s like that. There’s some self-sabotaging subconscious glitch that distorts your perception. Some fucking mechanism, a brutally efficient one, whose purpose is to make sure you’re never happy. That if somebody likes you you can never find them attractive, but if they don’t give a fuck about you they’re painfully beautiful. This is not news to anybody, my saying this. But Jesus– it’s fucking perverse.

9 Responses to “That Thing with the One Chick’s Face”

  1. Paul August 8, 2012 at 7:40 pm #

    I’m almost about to pop, jerkin it to some girls fuck stripper porn. I focus on the face of the hooker: trying to guess her source of self loathing. Good fun. I pop, and then focus on the immaculately manicured ball sack. So yeah, I hear what your sayin.

  2. Paul August 8, 2012 at 7:42 pm #


  3. sylviasarah August 8, 2012 at 10:59 pm #

    Aw, this is actually a thing. Idk that popping off to dirty things is included but the thing where you want someone when they don’t want you and when they do want you you don’t want them anymore. I forgot what it’s called, something like the love paradox. Good job for a generalization actually being true 🙂

    • sylviasarah August 8, 2012 at 11:01 pm #

      That last part seems mean but…well it is. Sorry…

      • Anonymous August 8, 2012 at 11:50 pm #

        You really assume anyone’s ego would be hurt by your mundane commentary? You seem desperate for attention.

      • sylviasarah August 9, 2012 at 12:11 am #

        I figured someone would mention that but I apologize mostly when I think I’ve done something wrong, not necessarily just when someone points out my wrong doing. I probably am desperate for attention though.

  4. Jake August 10, 2012 at 2:56 am #

    Recently found a cute, 20 year old, English speaking, gainfully employed, non prostitute chick here in Cambodia. Which might be like, the only one of those in existence. Last night she sends me a text saying that she really likes me. Mental images of all her flaws immediately flood my brain, I never ever want to see her again. It’s some sort of cosmic joke.

  5. Jake August 10, 2012 at 2:14 pm #

    By the way, in case you don’t know this, I have sex with women a lot. You know I do, because I write about it on your blog and my blog. I swear, it’s totally true. Check out my completely insipid blog posts. They make up for being boring by being long.

    I just want to be sure you know that I’m a total womanizer and completely straight. I would like to prove that I’m straight by sucking your dick, so you can tell how much I don’t enjoy it.

    • R. Lee August 28, 2012 at 1:30 am #

      Hi, Jake,

      While you are sucking Taco dick, can I such your dick? We can do a threeway suckfest, mouth-to-dong, three guys long. That rhymes. I didn’t even try. See, just letting me write about suching your dick is making me such a better writer.

      Please let me such your dick. Thanks.

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