The Sabbath Was Made for Man, and Not Man for the Sabbath

24 Apr

I have that feeling of wanting to walk to Skid Row and get black tar, of wanting to fuck a hooker raw, but you can’t do either anymore. All the bums deal speed. It’s too easy to make. Trying to get another drug is like trying to buy American. The whores cost at least a hundred and they make you wear a condom. What’s the fucking point. I have that a feeling of wanting to jump ahead in time Billy Pilgrim style to the part of the Tinder date where she’s on my bed on top of the blankets. Black panties pulled to the side. They don’t match her bra; she didn’t plan on this; she didn’t shower. Perfect. That feeling of not wanting my entire fucking day to be typing in a coffee shop with some herbal tea because coffee is too strong a drug now. Having it after noon makes me cranky. I could just beat off but there isn’t dirty enough shit on the internet now. Mule porn means nothing to me. Fat girls being used crying, Punch and Judy Russian rape videos– all diminishing returns and that’s why I can’t go get a pint of whiskey or a little balloon of black tar from an old black lady’s mouth– I’m cursed to know it does nothing. It’ll just require more and more. Girls are like that too and money is like that too and the way out is to be of service to others but others can go fuck themselves. What I dread doing is exactly what I’ll do: herbal tea in a coffee shop, overhear some yuppies’ discussion about Coachella, post repetitive shit on my web site. I could go on this Tinder date but I don’t want to fucking perform. I don’t want to prove myself worthy of you. I want you to show up and fuck me. That’s why I typed everything I would say already and you can read it for free on the internet. I want to fuck somebody or punch somebody or take that motherfucking drink, but I won’t, I’m a pussy; I’ll post repetitive shit and text my mother and cook a nice healthy meal, leftovers for the week, go to bed early. Go to work, not get fired, save money for what. For what. For fucking what. Oh shit– new Game of Thrones tonight. Never mind, today will rule.

9 Responses to “The Sabbath Was Made for Man, and Not Man for the Sabbath”

  1. emptysubject April 24, 2016 at 1:52 pm #

    100 dollars for a whore isn’t so bad. Sure, they make you wear a condom, but if you strain your imagination you can almost feel something warm and wet on your dick. And they will show up and just fuck you. The problem is that 100 dollar whores are bottom of the barrel; they don’t perform well, and they won’t look you in the eye as you thrust and grunt over them. You get what you pay for…

    • BEN April 25, 2016 at 1:10 pm #


  2. Your friends son is a meth addict who sucks off 70 year old queers for cash to support his filthy drug habit April 24, 2016 at 5:24 pm #

    I’m glad your faggot cat is dead. Your fault for letting his stupid ass out, when you knew there were dogs nearby.

    Serves you right, you drunk, AA, black tar heroin junkie piece of shit. Fuck you and your phony, poseur acoustic guitar act. You are a 40 year old nothing.

    • Atlanta Man April 25, 2016 at 7:41 am #

      How do you really feel? Stop being nice and using such elegant language, express yourself freely.

    • BEN April 25, 2016 at 1:09 pm #


  3. Anony-fucking-mous April 25, 2016 at 6:02 pm #

    The new episode of GOT didn’t start until 8:10pm… That was 10 minutes of intro and slides from previous episodes. God-damnitt I waited what feels like an eternity. In dog years I whooshed through high school and college while anticipating this crap and they give me 48 minutes of shit, shit, and more shit. This was supposed to be the greatest Sunday in recent memory. Instead they cut content, and then complain that they only have 13 episodes worth of material left. Bitch How?!

  4. Anonymous April 26, 2016 at 8:31 pm #

    shit game of thrones did suck. feminist cunts

  5. stonerwithaboner April 26, 2016 at 10:00 pm #


    I feel cheated, thought this would be about music when I saw the title…

    anyways, man, I guess you are an okay writer because everytime I read your blog I feel better afterwards. I feel like I got a million bucks in the bank.

  6. Upriver paradise April 30, 2016 at 3:50 am #

    Col Kurtz felt this way too.

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