image stolen from http://www.ep.tc
I should have gone out with a five gram coke binge. Topped it off with some nasty skid row black tar. But this will have to do.
I’ve been sitting inside all day hung over. Reading stupid shit on the internet and listening to Opie and Anthony. Masturbating to small penis humiliation videos. I have work to do, important work. Big real estate project and a bunch of writing stuff. I need the money. I am too hung over. Continue reading
Anyway. I did not drink to excess last night. And you know… I feel OK. I feel better than usual. I also only smoked two cigarettes yesterday. These are longtime goals of mine– do not drink to excess every god damn motherfucking night, and, as a corollary, do not, having drunk to excess, stand out on the porch and take a couple drags off a fresh cigarette and then put it out, then go back in the house and take a shot, look at shit on wikipedia, then, fifteen minutes later, go back out and relight and take another couple drags off the cigarette until the thing is gone, and you have then smoked four cigarettes that day. And drunk six tall brandies. And you wake up with a fog in your sinuses, you know… some hissing behind your forehead, sour phlegm in your mouth, and a cough that feels like it can’t quite reach the very bottom of your lungs where a couple oysterlike lumps of mucous are sitting in a soup of ashes and tar.
So today is not one of those days. And I feel somewhat better. The thing is, merely feeling a notch or two physically better does not even begin to address the larger problems in your life. The day to day, just– suck. The removal of this small negative does not quite get you to zero. And that’s all life is, a struggle to get to zero.
delicioustacos 