Brain Damage Diary

14 Mar

Rain at 2AM and one big thunderclap. Brain damaged from sparring. Brain and face damaged. My instructor whose day job is at an elementary school, who cheers you hitting pads like a kindly dolphin trainer– he wore shorts for the first time. Calves like cinderblocks. Veins thick as gas hoses snaking over them. He has 15 lbs on me and was a professional kickboxer. He went easy. I’m brain damaged. Driving home. Each stoplight had to relearn I was sitting in a car I needed to operate. Thinking ten times did I miss my turn. Is that McDonald’s supposed to be there. Continue reading

Birthday 2021

20 Feb

This year sucked. I want my money back. Can the damage be reversed. A year alone. Year as a male self improvement caricature. Year in the Joe Rogan Expanded Universe. A guy talked shit so I learned boxing. Watched MMA. When you box you put your front leg out. A guy can kick it. How to prevent this. I learned Muay Thai. Primitive instinctual bare bow archery. Bought and customized a rifle. Put 3,000 rounds through it. Waiting. Waiting for savage Robert E. Howard hordes to swarm the stairs. Waiting to make my stand. Nothing happens. My ears just ring. Continue reading

Phil Spector

17 Jan

I don’t know what happened when he killed that girl. I only know what happened at the end. My aunt who died in April was close with him. When he made his music and then after, when they found the girl from Barbarian Queen with a bullet hole through her palate and her teeth on the carpet in his castle out in Alhambra. Continue reading

Vaccine Report

16 Jan

Japanese Girlz HIGH VR Porn Videos & HD Scene Trailers | Pornhub

I got the Moderna. The first shot. Yesterday felt like I got punched in the arm. Today like a mule kicked me. Otherwise just subtleties.
Continue reading

Woodbury

3 Jan

This guy kept me alive. I’m gonna keep him alive. A lonely, lonely year but I’d go out and my savage bear size feral cat Woodrow came and sat with me. He lives in the yard. It took me a year to touch him. A year of leaving out food. Water. Crouching down saying hey man I’m not gonna hurt you. Don’t be scared. Continue reading

The Ending

30 Dec

This year was like a movie where the first two acts were good and the ending sucked. You gotta write the ending first.

Continue reading

Seeking Arrangement

13 Dec

She got scammed by a white guy named Ray who drove a 2005 Toyota Camry. They met in his car. He said he’d give her a check for tuition but needed her routing number. $1800 and she sent him $800 back in Green Dot money cards. For supplies for his business. She had to close her bank account. Her cunt juice stuck my boxers to my balls. Whatever covenant there was between men and women is gone. This is the warlord period.

Prayer Number 7

6 Dec

I got a rub ‘n’ tug. When I came the woman said “ahh, too long alone.” 
Continue reading

The Red-Whiskered Bulbul

1 Dec

  

From Savage Spear of the Unicorn

I went to pray this morning, looking out the front window. In the front yard the grass has gone to seed. A little wren came. And then finches with red faces, I don’t know what they are. Landing on the foxtail grass making it sway under their little weight. Throwing their heads back to swallow the seeds. They inspect the weeping ficus I have outside in a pot. Investigate the undersides of the leaves. Maybe looking for aphids. A female hummingbird, a rufous or Allen’s hummingbird, perching on the ficus branch, fluffing her neck, stretching out her long exotic tongue. You can hear the mourning doves out back. The mockingbirds. Ravens with their tock-tock sound like that hollow ribbed wooden thing you rubbed with a stick in music class in third grade. Not so bad. Power lines come down from my house, down the hill to the street, and the other day the rare red-whiskered bulbul landed there and looked at me. He was with his four children. I was afraid he’d die alone. But he caught a break.

Prayer Number 6

18 Nov

Yoshiyuki Iwase

I pray for my enemy to have a hot Asian wife with a tight, tasty pussy. No weird nipples. Perfectly proportioned nipples like Lilly had, not wormy ones. Not big personal pan pizza size areolas. Relatively small short nipples but not freakish small to where your mouth could find no purchase. Sensitive and she cums easily. Doesn’t mind when you cum too soon.

Continue reading